To build self-trust as we build our businesses, we need to take a look at ourselves, where we are in our personal lives, and how circumstances can bring challenges. However, taking care of ourselves and carving out time to focus on our goals can be nearly impossible at times. But when you know yourself more deeply, when you hang in there and don’t give up, when you show up and do the work — you cannot fail. You may need to go slowly but you will succeed.
Life Coach Andrea Giles has lived this truth. She speaks and coaches from the perspective of having a large blended family and having gone through the pain of marital infidelity and divorce from her first husband. In addition to her coaching business, Andrea is remarried and has 11 children (with one more on the way). She definitely knows a thing or two about building a business while being a present and amazing mother! I’m excited to have her with me for this episode to discuss how personal challenges can be turned into strength and reliable self-trust.
What You’ll Learn
Being okay with not always getting it right
Giving yourself the freedom to seek help
How self-trust permeates your entire business
Honoring what you want
Elevating through self-trust
Building consistency and alignment
Developing and having peace with your solutions for how to “have both”
Identifying painful stories from your past and making peace
Getting your own head unstuck
Best business decisions to move forward
Jumping into what you know is right for you
Grounding yourself in self-trust
Shifting self-trust as your identity changes
Owning the truth that you have what someone else needs
Being good with going slowly
Contact Info and Recommended Resources
Connect with Andrea Giles
“I help my clients discover for themselves what is best for them from a place of love and self-confidence.” — Andrea Giles
Andrea Giles is a professional, certified Life Coach with a coaching program designed for women in the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints who have experienced marital infidelity. She mainly coaches using online video conferencing, which allows her to work with anyone, anywhere in the world. Her coaching is one-on-one and for any woman who wants to take full ownership of her life and move forward towards a life she will love, regardless of her spouse’s actions.
Andrea coaches from a place of personal experience, building a strong, trusting relationship with each woman she coaches. Using both reprogrammed thinking and the tools that personally worked for her, she helps women move on from past events and learn to trust themselves and others again. Just as Andrea was able to let go of painful stories she’d carried around from her past marriage, and gain new confidence that she’s totally lovable just as she is, she helps guide other women into that same place of healing, growth and happiness.
Get Andrea’s FREE guide that will teach you the 3 biggest lies about infidelity:andreagiles.com/about — simply scroll to the bottom and click the button marked “I want it!”
Welcome to the Masterful Coach Podcast with Molly Claire, where coaches learn skill mastery, business mastery, and Life Mastery at a whole new level. If you’re ready to create a meaningful coaching business that makes a difference, you’re in the right place. And now your host, Master coach instructor, Molly, Claire.
Molly Claire: Hey, coach. All right, I’ve got a special treat for you today. I’m interviewing Andrea Giles on the podcast. Andrea was one of our first members in the Coaching Collective and has been with us from the beginning, and has worked in our business as well. And Andrea has such an amazing story. The thing I love about this interview with Andrea is that she shares what’s real behind the scenes and what was real behind the scenes for her as she started her business. And we talk about with Andrea and her story, how a lot of the foundation of that first year didn’t look like a lot in her business, but it set her up for such success and growth. I’m so grateful for Andrea’s openness and her vulnerability. She is such an example of a coach who stays committed and makes it happen. So I hope you enjoy this podcast with Andrea.
Hey, coaches. Okay, you are in for a treat today. I have Andrea Giles here who is an amazing coach, amazing business builder. And I am so inspired by her and her story. I’m going to like cry even thinking about it. So I’m just really excited to bring Andrea here. Hello, Andrea.
Andrea Giles: Hello, Molly, so much for having me.
Molly Claire: So fun to have you. I’m just like thinking back on all of the coaching calls over the last couple of years. And I’m excited to share a little of your story today.
Andrea Giles: Awesome. Thank you.
Molly Claire: Okay, so first of all, tell the people who are you, tell us about your coaching practice.
Andrea Giles: Okay, so I’m Andrea Giles, I coach women who have dealt with infidelity in their marriage. And most of them are trying to decide if they’re going to stay or leave. And I help them with that, people who the decisions men made for them, I help them get clarity about how they want to move forward and teach them the tools and skills that they need to do that.
Molly Claire: Awesome. Love it. Okay, so today I brought Andrea on, because I wanted to talk about self-trust. And I think that, as I’ve worked with Andrea, and I’ve seen you build your business, I’ve seen this be such a big key piece for you and building your business. So Andrea, in your personal life you have how many kids? Come on, tell us.
Andrea Giles: So many kids. I have 11 kids and one in the oven. So, this is my seventh biological kid that’s coming. And then I have five bonus kids. And it’s just me and my husband. Our first spouses have both passed away. It’s us all the time. It’s really that. There’s a lot of them.
Molly Claire: Yes, I know. You’re one of the only people that can beat me out with the plans. I got eight. You got me way beat out.
Andrea Giles: I don’t know if that’s like, should I get a price for that? I don’t know.
Molly Claire: We should get something. You should definitely do something. And that’s one of the things like I know, as we kind of talked about getting together with this podcast, I remember when you first joined the Collective and doing those personal mastery calls with you and I see you laughing here. You remember?
Andrea Giles: Oh, yeah.
Molly Claire: I had a lot of T’s, a lot of thoughts about your life, because I know what it’s like to have the amount of kids that I have. And in the Collective for those of you that aren’t a part of the collective we have personal mastery calls. And right now they have mentor calls. But some of these calls were just like me and you Andrea, or you and Amy, a lot of those calls that we were doing were not really focused on business, but really you and your personal life and what you were dealing with. And I think this is important. I think this ties into this topic of self-trust, to really take a look at, like where we all start and the challenges that are in the way of building a business.
Andrea Giles: Yes, absolutely. And sometimes I go and look at video recordings. Like, “Oh, you’re so cute. Look at you.” I had eight kids living at home during that time. And we lived in a house that was I mean eight kids, right? I didn’t have an office. There was nowhere in my bedroom to set up like even a desk. So I was either in my corner office which was a corner in the living room with a barstool and that books and then my laptop stacked on top of it in the corner or in my bed at times, in my bed sitting in my bed talking to Molly, I remember that too.
Molly Claire: Yes, I remember you’d be in your room. And I know also you are going through different health challenges and stuff as well with not having a lot of energy, having some fatigue. So you’ve got the kids, the blend, the household, the health and all of that. And you were just like doing the thing. You are in the Coaching Collective. You’re like, I’m going to build this business. But you knew you needed to attend to you and your life and make sure that was in place before you could do all of it. Do the thing.
Andrea Giles: Yes. 100%. I remember when I joined and it’s kind of fun, because I was in the first round of the Coaching Collective. And I remember reading the copy, reading the sales page going, I have to join, like I knew it was just like, “Oh, totally are calling me out. That’s me.” And I remember the timing of it was interesting, because I had just graduated from LCS, I was in the entree track, entrepreneur track. So there are assignments and things with that. And then I joined the Coaching Collective and did it at the same time. And for me, it was the greatest gift I could give myself because a lot of the time that we were meeting it was during the summer, if you remember, like a lot of it was during the summer. And I had eight kids at home like a lot of the time.
It was such a gift to give myself to keep my head in it, to keep my head in the coaching world moving forward, challenging myself. And it did teach me I mean, this is about self-trust that if you don’t give up and just keep showing up, you will not fail period, you will not fail. So I was not busting it to like build my business to go gangbusters with my business that summer I was hanging on. I coach, a few clients, and I showed up to every call for the Coaching Collective. And that was my keeping going was just consistently showing up doing the work inside the collective. And it really paid off when I was ready to kind of light that fire under my business.
Molly Claire: Yes, I think there’s so much value in this because I know coaches listening or relating to some of the things that you’re saying. And I know when I think back to when I started, same thing, I had a desk in the corner of my daughter’s room. And back then I had like a landline and I was using freeconferencecallHD.com calls. The beginning phase of building a business, there’s nothing like sexy about it and especially when you are figuring out how to build this business from the ground up and managing your personal life as well.
I think it can be very easy to say this isn’t the right time, it will happen when. I know for me, I want to just share a little bit about my story. I remember when I found coaching, I knew that I needed to do it. And what I told myself is one day I’m going to do that because at the time, I had chronic fatigue, my marriage not going so great. And had my three kids and the timing did not seem right to me. And luckily for me, I got an email from the Life Coach School with a message saying that the founder of the school, Brooke Castillo herself was teaching one last class. And so I’m grateful for that because it pushed me instead of being in the space of one day, I’ll do it, It made me say I have to do this right now.
I jumped in, and then I never looked back. And so I think there’s a lot of value in what you’re saying because I know you coaches listening out there relate to some of these things or wonder well, maybe now’s not the time. But I think for you, Andrea, you hit it on the head like this was your commitment to staying in it and moving forward even though you weren’t creating a lot in your business at the time, you were setting a solid foundation. Love it. Okay, so tell me when you think about self-trust, and I know we’ve talked about the collective specifically, what do you think of a self-trust? Or What did you learn working through this program about what self-trust is for you?
Andrea Giles: So I’ve been thinking about that a lot. I feel like for me, where I have grown so much in this area, is just this deep inner knowing that no matter how miserable I might feel in a moment, as I’m growing my business as I’m dealing with whatever that I will come through it and that I will be okay and that I can count on me, that I can count on myself that I will always show up. When I first started to coaching, I had a lot of drama about that because I’ve always been a stay at home mom, I didn’t come into coaching with a background in corporate or anything fancy, I came into it because I knew that I wanted to help people. That’s why I did it. So I had a lot of doubt about my ability to grow a business to do this thing, like, even keep my commitment to doing it.
I was kind of afraid of what if I fail? What if I quit? And what I’ve learned over time is that it is just not an option. Like, it’s not like I will, I won’t quit. And when I have those moments, which I still do, feeling like, oh, this is really uncomfortable. I trust myself, that I will keep going through it, that I will hang in there with the discomfort, push through the discomfort and get to the other side of it. And of course, on the Tibet, the mat with a new kind of discomfort, they never go away at the different levels, but I trust myself now that it’s okay. Like even in the discomfort, like I’ve got myself. The other piece too, is just in decision making.
Molly Claire: Oh, yes. 100%.
Andrea Giles: Yeah, there have been many times where I thought I was going to do something. I’ve had plenty of fails, I’ve had plenty of things that I thought were a good idea and that I scrapped, and that I know that I’ll just figure it out and keep going. And it’s not a problem. It’s not a problem. It’s not a problem to get it wrong sometimes, I can still jump back in and keep going. And that’s such a gift to know that about yourself.
Molly Claire: Yes. And it’s like, as you’re talking, it’s so clear that you have that certainty in yourself and that confidence there. And I think about like, we become coaches, and we have all these skills we’re learning, sales, marketing, how to be a leader, how to run a business. But truly, I think that self-trust, that confidence in your capability is the best skill. It’s the one behind it all. Everything else is just there’s a million different ways you can do sales or marketing or whatever but having that as the foundation, that’s the key, because the only way that you’re going to fail is if you quit, right.
Andrea Giles: Absolutely. I think for me, a thought that I have rehearsed many times is I’ll figure it out. I trust myself that if it’s a tech thing, which I do not enjoy tech stuff, and I’ve shed tears for tech staff, but it’s like Andrea, you’ll figure it out, you’re going to figure it out, because I just know that I’m not going to quit. I know that I’m going to keep going. And part of that self-trust is that I know that I can ask people for help, that I don’t have to have all the answers. I don’t have to figure it all out. That I’ll figure it out. And sometimes figuring it out, is asking for help or getting beyond your own head.
Molly Claire: Yeah. And I think also that confidence makes it easier to do that because you’re no longer in this place of doubt and insecurity and thinking that you either should figure it out or almost like just indulging in I don’t know what to do. Instead, you have that certainty and you see it as no big deal.
Andrea Giles: Yeah. I remember Molly, this is back when you and Amy were doing the one on one calls for the Coaching Collective. You’re both on the call. And I remember saying to you in that call that I felt guilty because I felt like I should have it figured out on my own. And I don’t think that anymore at all. I just don’t, like why should I? Why? Why should I have this figured out? Could I figure it out? Yep. But why not like speed along the process by bringing in people who can help me?
Molly Claire: Yes. We’ve been talking about in the collective with our sales launch coming up some of the poisonous thoughts, this makes me think of it and I’m going to be doing an episode on this. It’s like I should be further along. I should have figured this out. I should know what I’m doing. We have such high expectations that we should know stuff that we like, never had the opportunity to learn.
Andrea Giles: Yes. Why should we know it? I had no reason to learn marketing while I was staying at home.
Molly Claire: Other than like, selling your kids on the importance of taking a nap.
Andrea Giles: In their chores.
Molly Claire: Okay, so I want to know from you, how would you describe when you think about how self-trust comes into play for you on a regular basis in your business? How do you see it playing an important role?
Andrea Giles: Oh, it’s huge. It’s become one of the most important pieces of my business and I’ll try to articulate this well, okay. So something that I have learned is that part of self-trust, I believe is really paying attention to what you want, and really listening to what you want, not what other people think you should want. It’s listening to what you want. And part of self-trust for me has been honoring what I want, even if not a person in the world understands. And part of the self-trust that I’ve come to understand and appreciate so much is that when I name what I want an honor what I want, and don’t negotiate with it, it helps everyone around me. And what I mean by that, like, for example, with coaching, every time I raise my prices, it feels super uncomfortable. It feels uncomfortable. But I check in and say, do you like your reasons? Is this where you want to take your business? And if the answer is yes, I let that be stronger than any doubt any of the drama, I let that kind of be like my North Star, and trust that by me honoring it, I will be a better coach, I will be a better leader, I will show up from that space.
I’ve learned not to negotiate with myself. That comes from practicing it and honing this trust in myself that there’s a reason why I want the things that I want. Those reasons are good. And that the more I trust it, the more I elevate myself and the people around me. And it’s like magic. It’s so cool to watch.
Molly Claire: I think that’s such a great way to think about it and look at it because as coaches, oftentimes we’re natural helpers, we want to help everyone else, and sometimes to the detriment of us are putting our needs aside. And so I love that framing. It’s that whole idea of like, when I honor me, when I honor what I want, when I stay committed and true to me, it helps everyone else. It’s true, right? But it’s sometimes hard for us to see it that way.
Andrea Giles: Yes. And it’s always so fun. It’s it really is like magic that when I like I’m going back to like raising my prices, okay, so I raised my prices earlier in the year. And I remember feeling nervous about it, but really just recommitting to it over and over because I did like my reasons for it. This is what I started to see, I started to see these clients that showed up and they were ready to go. They had a transformation when they handed over the money because it was their concept of themselves. What they thought they were worth, what they thought that they were capable of. And I’ve had people do all kinds of things to be able to pay for coaching. And it’s inspiring and to watch them often before they even come to the first session. I’ve had some kind of amazing thing happened in their life, because they have elevated their own self-concept by saying yes, I am worth this price. And guess who else is elevated on the other end? I am, because it’s me needing to see myself as this coach at this level, and showing up at that level. So that’s just one example of how it helps me and helps them.
Molly Claire: I totally agree. I mean, I think back to when I was going through my divorce, and I have this moment that I knew I am committed to making my life better than this. And I’m going to pay the best coach that I know. And I didn’t need at that time a handout or a discount. What I needed was to say I’m putting my money where my mouth is, I’m paying top dollar to get a top dollar quality of life. I think that has a huge impact. And I think even by requiring that of your clients, you’re really kind of leading them on this path of self-trust as well and self-confidence, right?
Andrea Giles: Yes. 100% because what do they have to believe about themselves? Yes, that they’re worth it, that they matter, that they their life experience matters.
Molly Claire: Yes. I feel Andrea, like you’re such a good example to other coaches of someone who is really committed to where you’re headed. And you’ve internalized all of it like I think about, because in the beginning of the Collective, of course, I think it was you, Andrea that said, you think of the Collective as like slowing down to go fast because everyone gets in, and they’re like, okay, I want to do the ads and do the videos and put the stuff and we’re like, hold on, let’s put the brakes on. What do you want? Who are you? What is it that you desire in your life in business?
I feel like you’ve really taken that in and committed to it. And I just see that you’ve been such a good example of that consistency, and going all in on giving yourself permission to want. This is the life I want.
Andrea Giles: I will say for anybody who’s listening that that first year when I did the Coaching Collective, full transparency here that year, I was committed, like I said, to keep my head in it, to building consistency with myself, building that trust that I’m going to show up, I’m going to keep coming, I’m going to do the assignments I’m going to show up. I was not in a spot where I wanted loads of clients. I was there, I had eight kids at home. I wasn’t to that spot yet. However, it laid the most powerful foundation. So if you looked at how much money I made that year, it’s not impressive at all. 6700 bucks. Okay. The next year, however, I broke 100,000 because I was ready. I had built such a foundation of trust that I was ready. I was ready to take care of the clients, I was ready to go.
Molly Claire: And your goal was 50,000 that year. So you doubled it? And I do think that’s so worth talking about because it can be so discouraging for new coaches. I didn’t make very much money when I first started. But it’s laying that foundation. And then it just kind of it goes up so quickly when you have a good foundation.
Andrea Giles: Yeah, exactly. And I heard something this last week that stuck with me, it was something like it doesn’t take time it takes alignment. And that means to me is that I was very, very intentional that first year of being honest with myself. What I wanted was to be with a two seniors living at home and I wanted to be present, I wanted to help them get out the door and continue to work with my business, but be more present with my family than having lots of clients that year. And that was alignment for me. That was aligned. And then the next year, what felt like alignment to me was to really put myself out there and help a lot of people. And it happened quickly. It happened when I was aligned. I was like, all right, here we go.
Molly Claire: And I think it’s been so fun to watch, because Andrea started working for us in the Collective leading our sales team and all of that. And sadly, as your business has gotten so big and amazing, we have had to let Andrea go in that capacity. But that’s really what we want. We want you to have that. And now it’s been so fun to talk to you, I think back to when we were having those calls when you had all the kids and the blending and just the stuff, the life going. And now when we talk about helping you scale, the way you are going to that next level, even with this new surprise baby coming in, it’s like your level of certainty and vision in how you’re scaling, this is phenomenal. It’s really exciting to think about.
Andrea Giles: Thank you. Thank you. The curveball of this baby threw me for a while. And I had to get back in alignment like Andrea, it’s okay. My brain offered all the drama of oh, you’re going to have to quit, because that’s all I’ve ever been. When I’ve had babies, I’ve been a stay at home mom. But then going back to self-trust, what if you could do both? What if you’ve tried raising mom to this new one and continue to grow your business? And ultimately, that’s what I want? So I’m opening myself up to continuing to step into that not knowing every detail of how it’s going to work, but trusting that it will work. That matters to me.
Molly Claire: And I think that a lot of people, a lot of times people hear I can do this and do this. And we have the sense, I almost have this like visceral reaction of like, spreading yourself then, expecting too much. But that’s not it at all. It’s really like, what if these two things can fit together in a way that aligns with me and my life and what I want. That’s when we’re thinking from that higher level, a higher view, rather than the go to View of we just need to do more, be more, spread ourselves thin, and be crazy person trying to manage too many things. That’s not what it is at.
Andrea Giles: Yeah, I feel like, the more I tuned into what I actually want, when I spend the time I want to spend in my business intentionally and spend the time with my family intentionally, I get so much more out of each experience. Instead of feeling guilty while I’m in my office working because the kids are out there. That felt good. And I’ve learned to teach myself like why it is working. Like why the things that I want are also working for the people behind my door like right now, I got a bunch of kids behind my door and going, why does it matter though? I’m in here on a podcast, and I’m letting them kind of fend for themselves right now. And I can back it up with like reasons that I like, because I have done that work instead of feeling guilty.
Molly Claire: Yes. And I think for coaches listening that are like, oh, wouldn’t it be nice? Believe me like, we don’t get here overnight. It’s a process. I remember feeling the pull, the guilt, all of the questioning, all of the doubt all of that. And I kept working toward moving to this place you’re describing. And then it was kind of like, over time, you just realized one day I did anyway. I was like, “Oh, I kind of have this figured out, I’m at peace with what’s behind my office door, or like outside my office door. I’m at peace with what’s in my office. I’m at peace with me.” And so I think it’s a matter of continuing to really lean into solving for it and answering the questions for yourself, rather than just resisting guilt and staying in that cycle of feeling pulled in two directions.
Andrea Giles: Yes, exactly. I love that you said solving for it, because that’s exactly what it is. Like, if I want this and I want this, our brains go to that all or nothing. I can’t have both. If I could have both and feel really at peace and like it’s working, what would that look like? And then taking our brain to that place.
Molly Claire: Yes, exactly. So we can align with what we want in our life. Okay, I’d love for you to share any kind of moment of like vulnerability or doubt that you overcame that stands out to you.
Andrea Giles: I have a big one. And this was with Molly and Amy, coaching with you and Amy. Probably my biggest hang up in becoming a coach was that it’s around this thought that I am more insecure than other people. And I brought that to coaching and I remember just crying like crying like it felt so real. It felt so real. I even had, like somebody kind of important in my life when I was like 20 years old tell me that my biggest weakness was how insecure I was as if you were just telling me the weather. And I believed him and I carried that around and I go, you can’t do that you’re too insecure. That but up so strong against what I was seeing, like I’m growing I’m doing this thing that takes a lot of courage yet, I still had this lingering story that really wreaks havoc sometimes.
I brought it to a call and I was crying and it just felt so true like just the circumstance, you’re too insecure. And the coaching, I got a couple different times. It took me a couple times to really unravel this. But I think one session with you and one with Amy was around pretty much making peace with insecurity and just going, what if it’s not a problem? What if it’s just there sometimes, and you get to decide, like I was making it mean that because it was there, I could not be successful because this thing is there. And the coaching I got was that kind of like so what? Like so what that you feel insecure? Sometimes Europe, a human that sometimes feels insecure? It might sound simple, but in my mind, I could finally see the difference between it being a circumstance and just a feeling. I was just feeling this feeling and then I got to make it mean, whatever I wanted.
From that moment on, it just loosened its grip, like so much. It just like, cracked it open, and allowed me to see that, I didn’t have to wait for this to go away before I could do whatever I wanted. I was allowed to come along. And as I have practice that and come more peaceful with that feeling of insecurity, it has decreased more and more where it doesn’t really as often.
Molly Claire: Yes. It’s kind of like you have a feeling of insecurity, thoughts, feelings, this experience of insecurity. And then that in and of itself becomes a problematic circumstance. Like just the fact that you’re thinking and feeling it, then you have all of these thoughts about that. How can I build this business if I am feeling insecure? Where it’s like, it’s just there. I actually had a conversation about this today with some of my students, and one of them asked me, because we were talking about that even in coaching, that any coach is going to feel doubt sometimes. And I have these new coaches that are saying, like, I feel this doubt, and then they get stuck in their head. And I was talking about everyone having doubt and one of my students asked me, when was the last time you felt out when you were coaching? And I said, I probably feel it all the time. But I just don’t even notice it. Because you’re coaching and sure you have, like, doubts coming in. And it’s like, okay, I just don’t pay attention to them. What I pay attention to is staying connected with the client, what do I think this client needs. And so it’s kind of reminds me of exactly the same thing when we can make room for that insecurity and doubt and all of it to be there. And it doesn’t have to be a big deal, then it doesn’t have to rule our life or decide what’s possible.
Andrea Giles: Yeah, that’s right. And it’s also a huge lesson to me that I can have a sometimes really messy brain and still be successful. Who knows? Wait to have things all lined up and we’re just perfectly coached and like, just killing it. And then we can be successful. And what I’ve learned is, I’d be waiting a very long time, like forever.
Molly Claire: That’s right. I know. Like, let’s just move forward and do it. Let’s create everything we want with our messy brain. So thinking about where you are and how far you’ve come in your business, I’d love for you to share maybe like one or two of the best decisions for you.
Andrea Giles: For sure. I look back at just deciding to become a coach, I went through the Life Coach School. For me, when I first started learning about the Life Coach School, it was kind of a loud, kind of like Molly instant recognition, this is what you need to do, you need to do it now. And that was just life changing for me to kind of put a stake in the ground and say that I matter and that I have something to offer and go for it. And so I did that. The next thing that I will say is the decision to join the Coaching Collective. It was, again, one of those times where I recognized it. Like we’re all being offered things all the time.
You see this program or this program or this product or this course all the time. For me, I remember when I was reading through the materials about the Coaching Collective, I knew it as if it was for me. Like that’s what it felt. My only hesitation was, like I said earlier, shouldn’t I be able to do this by myself? So I want to say that for any people who are listening, who can relate, why should you do it by yourself? Why not do it with friends and people who have gone before you. It was such a good decision for me. I loved it so much. I went through it twice.
Molly Claire: Yes, because you did the first level and then you did VIP mentor level. Now in the mastermind, of course.
Andrea Giles: Yes, I’m in the mastermind right now. And I think for me, I mean, for so many reasons, but it definitely more than anything else that I have done, the Coaching Collective is what really helped build that self-trust. I remember distinctly going in feeling shaky as a brand new coach, like, am I really a coach, can I actually help anybody? And I remember when I left just feeling so much more grounded, just more settled in my head like yes, Andrea, you can do this. Yes, you can be successful. Yes, you can come up with content and create awesome things. And oh, like so amazing. For me, that was another huge decision. I will say, for me, I feel so blessed that I got to work in the Coaching Collective, like, so amazing.
Molly Claire: So fun to have you like, behind the scenes.
Andrea Giles: Yes, I so much love it, it’s such an honor. So I feel like that decision was a really pivotal one for me, that has really blessed my own business in huge ways because it was like, again, I’ve been a stay at home mom, and to be hired in this position and to feel, you know, proficient at it, like I can do it well, and that just helped build myself trust, build my confidence in myself that I can do this, that I can be successful as a coach.
Molly Claire: I love it. And as all you coaches that are listening, I think it’s important to notice that, Andrea, you didn’t wait until you had full self-trust or full self-confidence. You were shaky, you felt insecure, you had doubts, but you took the step. And I think that’s all of us. Like you were saying, if we’re waiting to have all the confidence before we do it, we’re never going to get there. And I think that as we built the program, and as we watch people start coming through, I think the things at the end of the day that they come through with everyone wants like this tangible thing. What is it? But what we see is people are grounded in themselves, they have self-trust. They have confidence in their abilities to build a business, confidence in their abilities to coach and they are comfortable and clear on what they want in their life. So it’s like no more compare and despair instead, this is what I want. I’m allowed to want this. And I am capable of creating it.
Andrea Giles: Yeah. And there’s no price tag that you can even attach to that.
Molly Claire: I know, right? I know, it’s kind of like, even when I’ve just trained coaches, and their coach certification, it’s like, you think that you paid this money to be a coach, but really what you’re getting out of this is you’re changing your own life. And you can’t put a price on that. Okay, so I want to know from you how you think, so right now you are creating an amazing business. Andrea and I, we talked in California, after advanced relationship coach training at that dinner, you were like, I want big things. Like, I don’t just want a small business. I want something big. And I totally relate. And that’s what we’re doing. So let me tell you, or let me ask you, as you are moving toward this next level of your business that you’re creating, while keeping your priorities, how do you see self-trust coming into play? What does it look like for you?
Andrea Giles: Yeah, I feel like for me, where I’m at right now is going from this shift from being trusted myself as a coach, and as a leader, to being like a powerful CEO. Even saying that out loud feels a little uncomfortable. Not going to lie, because it’s kind of who I’m moving into.
Molly Claire: It’s like that identity shift.
Andrea Giles: Yes, it is like that, because what that looks like for me is hiring people. Like being the boss, the CEO. And so I feel like where that self-trust comes in, is in so many levels. It’s not about, I’ll just get it right every time and knock it out of the park. No, I realize I’m well aware that sometimes I’ll probably bomb. Sometimes I will make mistakes and have something that I’ve worked hard on and need to reconfigure. That’s something I’ve watched from you, Molly. I’ve watched Molly so many times in her business, put all this time into things and be like no, scrapping it, starting over. And she doesn’t make it mean anything. She’s just like, oh, it was an idea. Let’s try another idea.
I feel that comes from that really strong self-trust that is not a problem. That you’ll figure out that, again, like if you just keep trying, you’re going to hit the target. So for me moving forward, as I look to, particularly next year where I’m going to be taking some maternity leave, but I still have goals and I still at the root of it is there are a lot of people who need help. There are a lot of people who are really, really suffering, and I want to help them. And that self-trust comes in and trusting that I’m the person that they’re waiting for that they’re waiting to work with me. Particular with me and then I have to get my brain on board of why they’re waiting to work with me. Why me? What is it about me that they want? And so all of those things have been like, all the work that I continue to practice.
Molly Claire: Yeah. Love it. It’s amazing. You’re inspiring to me, and I know to so many people listening because it’s just like, this is how it begins. We begin uncertain, not really sure what we’re doing, trying to figure it all out. And I just think you’re such a great example of commitment of like, putting in the work, taking steps forward and really committing to what you want.
Andrea Giles: Thank you. Can I say one more thing, Molly?
Molly Claire: Yes.
Andrea Giles: The other piece I want to just add for coaches listening is that I know we see these coaches who like, are constantly creating new content constantly posting and producing and all of that. That’s not me. And I say that because I think that we think that we need to look a certain way or move at a certain pace. Me personally, if you look at like different times where I’ve shifted things in my business, I’m not super-fast at like, I kind of take my time until I feel good and ready. Not like waiting to feel ready. But when I really trusted it’s the right time to take the next step forward. And you know what, it has served me well, it does me well and like financially, it hasn’t hurt me it’s helped me because taking my time in things has helped me get a much clearer understanding of the layout in front of me, the people that I’m serving, really getting to know what they need before I’m like, oh, and now I need to go do this, and I need to offer this and this and this. I’m just not that coach. There are plenty of people who are and that’s not a problem, but I’m saying for those of you who are kind of the slow and steady type, that would be me. It’s worked out really well. It’s fine. It’s not a problem.
Molly Claire: I love it. I think making room for everyone’s different work styles. And Amy and I have a different work style in the Collective too. And I have to say before we finish up it’s so funny so I love turtles. You know those chocolate turtles — did I already tell you this Andrea?
Andrea Giles: You did it, but tell everybody.
Molly Claire: Okay. They’re turtles basically lives, chocolate pecan, Carmel, but they’re called millionaires. And that’s like what it says on the bag and I still have the bag. I bought them one day. I’m like, I am keeping this and I love to think about that because it just like something that may be disguised as a turtle, but there’s like steadily moving along. All of a sudden, guess what? It’s actually a millionaire.
Andrea Giles: Yeah, absolutely, just got to keep going.
Molly Claire: Well, thank you so much for being here. You’re such an inspiration. We love having you in the Collective and also tell everyone where they can find you.
Andrea Giles: Yeah, sure. So my website’s AndreaGiles.com. I have an Instagram it’s Andrew Giles Coaching and then my podcast, I have a podcast, I’m a host of the Heal from Infidelity podcast. And you can just look it up, Heal from Infidelity. Andrea Giles.
Molly Claire: So awesome. That’s an amazing resource for these people going through something really challenging.
Andrea Giles: Thank you.
Molly Claire: Yeah, love it. And Andrea also does our dream come true result calls in the Coaching Collective so our coaches get a glimpse of her in that program.
Andrea Giles: I still keep my foot in the door.
Molly Claire: We can’t let her go completely. Thank you so much for sharing your story, Andrea.
Andrea Giles: Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate it.